Q: My 2 ½-year-old
son has been completely potty trained since 23 months. However, recently, he
has started peeing and popping in his pants. We stayed the course for a few
months, but the accidents kept getting more frequent. Plus, his temper tantrums
about using the potty became terrible. We put him back in pull-ups, and now he
goes in his pull-ups all the time. I think we’ve set a very bad precedent by
reverting to pull-ups, but I’m at a loss at how to start over.
A: It’s time to go cold turkey on the pull-ups. By that I
mean, take every pull-up out of the house and throw them away immediately. Then
begin his toilet-training rehabilitation. Pump him full of liquids and give him
a high fiber diet to get things moving along. Then put him in the bathroom with
a few toys and some books, and tell him he can come out after he uses the
potty. Once he’s had success, he can play until the potty bell dings (set a
kitchen timer to go off every hour at least, during which time you’re making
sure he’s drinking lots of water).
When the bell dings, it’s back to the bathroom again until
he uses the potty properly. Any “on-purposes” outside of the bathroom ensure a
return to the bathroom. Don’t let his temper tantrums derail you. Things will
likely get worse before they get better, so stay the course.
One other note: All four of my children had one “relapse”
period months after being fully potty-trained. In my opinion, the child becomes
more involved in what she’s doing to be bothered with going to the bathroom in
time to avoid “on purposes.”
To solve the problem, I simply told the child to go to the
bathroom when I saw the dance, leveling consequences when she refused. If the
child had an “on-purpose,” I confined her to her room for the rest of the day
and straight to bed after an early dinner. A few days of that cured the
problem, and she’ll be back to using the potty again on his own.
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