The Scenario:
Your preteen daughter and young teenage son get into the name-calling like no
one’s business. Idiot, stupid, you’ve heard them all. The name-calling
generally degenerates into a fight. How can you conquer this?
The Solution: You
can’t. Only the two of them can get a handle on this rivalry. One way to help
them figure out how to stop fighting so much is to designate a small space in
your home, such as a powder room, laundry room, or large closet, as the
“conference” room. When the arguing commences, direct them to take it to the
conference room for half an hour (set a timer). When the timer dings, ask them
if they’ve solved the problem. Most of the time, they probably have. If not,
then send them back in for another half hour.
This approach allows you to keep calm and them to discover
that they can solve their own problems and will likely fight less, given they
probably don’t want to spend thirty minutes in a small space with their sibling
every time they argue.
Excerpted from Ending
Sibling Rivalry: Moving Your Kids From War to Peace, available in October. Posted with permission of Beacon Hill Press of Kansas City
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