Setting Screen Time for Teens

Q: I’m looking for advice on out how to set reasonable screen-time restrictions for my older teens. They’re online to do their homework and usually chat with friends, update social media accounts, etc. But with summer coming, I want to balance freedom and independence along with off-screen time without my nagging them. What do you advise for screen time limits and how do I enforce those limits?

A: Children, especially teens, do not view screen time as anything but good. They also have no idea how long they actually spend with their eyes glued to a small or large screen (TV, video games, smartphones, tablets, etc.). Because digital devices are so addictive, the more they engage with such electronics, the more they will want to be always connected. There’s been tons of research recently that shows both the destructive additive nature of digital devices and the way those devices harm family relationships.

Image courtesy of ambro/FreeDigitalPhotos.com

To curb the technology beast in your home, I recommend jettisoning an hourly limit per day. You will find yourself in “police” mode as you argue with your teens about what constitutes usage and which clock to use to measure time. That’s one fight you don’t want to start because it will only cause stress and tension and accomplish nothing.

Instead, implement several “screen-free zones” throughout the day. Set aside specific blocks of time when everyone—including parents!—turn off all electronic devices. Mealtimes are a good place to start. Some families have a “technology” basket where everyone places their turned-off handheld devices when called to the table. No one, even Mom or Dad, gets up to answer a call during family meal times. Maybe you add an hour of technology-free time after dinner on Thursdays for a family game.

For the summertime, you could designate a two- or three-hour block of time each afternoon as a screen-free zone, to ensure that your teens are at least getting regular breaks from their devices. Institute a bedtime for devices, too, such as 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. the devices are off and in the basket (if your teen has a later curfew, then the device goes in the basket when he comes home).

Many teens need such guidelines to help them get a good night sleep, interact with the family, and remember that there is a life outside of texting. Whatever you decide, make it clear, enforce it, and don’t listen to the arguments as to why it’s so unfair (typical teen stuff). This is one instance where actions will speak volumes, so please make sure you follow the screen-free zones at mealtimes and bedtime, too. We as parents need to set a good example especially when it comes to using technology wisely.

Email Sarah if you have a parenting question you would like to see answered on this blog.